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By John Gray

 Joe gets up at 6:00am to prepare his morning coffee. He fills his pot
full of good clean drinking water because some liberal fought for
minimum water quality standards.

 He takes his daily medication with his first swallow of coffee. His
medications are safe to take because some liberal fought to insure
their safety and work as advertised.

 All but $10.00 of his medications are paid for by his employers
medical plan because some liberal union workers fought their
employers for paid medical insurance, now Joe gets it too. He prepares
his morning breakfast, bacon and eggs this day. Joe's bacon is safe to
eat because some liberal fought for laws to regulate the meat packing

 Joe takes his morning shower reaching for his shampoo; His bottle is
properly labeled with every ingredient and the amount of its contents
because some liberal fought for his right to know what he was putting
on his body and how much it contained. Joe dresses, walks outside and
takes a deep breath. The air he breathes is clean because some tree-
hugging liberal fought for laws to stop industries from polluting our

 He walks to the subway station for his government subsidized ride to
work; it saves him considerable money in parking and transportation
fees. You see, some liberal fought for affordable public
transportation, which gives everyone the opportunity to be a

 Joe begins his work day; he has a good job with excellent pay,
medicals benefits, retirement, paid holidays and vacation because some
liberal union members fought and died for these working standards.
Joe's employer pays these standards because Joe's employer doesn't
want his employees to call the union.

 If Joe is hurt on the job or becomes unemployed he'll get a worker
compensation or unemployment check because some liberal didn't think
he should loose his home because of his temporary misfortune.

 It's noon time, Joe needs to make a Bank Deposit so he can pay some
bills. Joe's deposit is federally insured by the FSLIC because some
liberal wanted to protect Joe's money from unscrupulous bankers who
ruined the banking system before the depression.

 Joe has to pay his Fannie Mae underwritten Mortgage and his below
market federal student loan because some stupid liberal decided that
Joe and the government would be better off if he was educated and
earned more money over his lifetime.

 Joe is home from work, he plans to visit his father this evening at
his farm home in the country. He gets in his car for the drive to
dad's; his car is among the safest in the world because some liberal
fought for car safety standards.

 He arrives at his boyhood home. He was the third generation to live
in the house financed by Farmers Home Administration because bankers
didn't want to make rural loans. The house didn't have electric until
some big government liberal stuck his nose where it didn't belong and
demanded rural electrification. (Those rural Republicans would still
be sitting in the dark)

 He is happy to see his dad who is now retired. His dad lives on Social
Security and his union pension because some liberal made sure he could
take care of himself so Joe wouldn't have to. After his visit with dad
he gets back in his car for the ride home.

 He turns on a radio talk show, the host keeps saying that liberals
are bad and conservatives are good (He doesn't tell Joe that his
beloved Republicans have fought against every protection and benefit
Joe enjoys throughout his day). Joe agrees, "We don't need those big
government liberals ruining our lives; after all, I'm a self-made man
who believes everyone should take care of themselves, just like I

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