"Conservo-speak"

"Sound Jurisprudence" = court rulings conservatives like
"Judicial Activism" = court rulings conservatives hate

"Special Interests" = lobbiests conservatives don't like
"Industry Spokesmen = lobbiests on the conservative payroll

"Law and Order" = government enforcing laws conservatives like
"Government Interference" = laws conservatives don't like

"Runaway Litigation" = lawsuits against big business
"Tort Reform" = legal protection for big business

"Refugees" = boat people conservatives like
"Illegal Immigrants" = boat people conservatives hate

"Faith-based Organization" = religions conservatives like
"Cults" = religious movements conservative disapprove of

"Democracies" = foreign governments conservatives (and their sheep in the
                mainstream media) like
"Regimes" = foreign governments conservatives (and their sheep in the
            mainstream media) don't like

"Militia leaders" = armed locals with conservative ideas
"Warlords" = armed foreigners who frighten conservatives

"Protection of Strategic Interest" = US interventionism
"Violation of Sovereign Boundaries" = when anyone else does it

"Welfare Queen" = federal handouts to people
"Vital Subsidy" = federal handouts to corporations

"Public Servant" = conservative congressmen
"Career Politician" = liberal congressmen

"Regrettable incident" = scandal involving a Republican
"Failure of liberal values" = scandal involving a Democrat

"Stock Market collapse" = share price slide under a Democratic president
"Market Correction" = share price slide under a Republican president

"Concerned Scientist" = an expert conservatives agree with
"Environmental Extremist" = an expert liberals agree with

"Unemployment" = people out of work under Democratic Administrations
"Labor surpluses" = people out of work under Republican Administrations

"Team Player" = a Republican Senate Majority Leader or House Speaker
                during a Republican administration
"Obstructionist" = a Democratic Senate Majority Leader or House Speaker
                   during a Republican administration

"Consulting Fee" = When a Republican legislator gets cash from an
                   interested organization
"Bribe" = When a Democrat legislator gets cash from an interested
          organization

"Resolute" = a conservative blundering ahead when all evidence points to
             his/her chosen course being completely wrong
"Waffling" = a liberal displaying thoughtfulness or weighing all the
             options

"Meltdown" = a liberal who delivers a scathing speech against a member
             of the opposition
"Tears _____ a new one" = a conservative who delivers a scathing speech
                           against a member of the opposition

"Naked Aggression" = When a country conservatives don't like invades
                     another country
"Pre-emptive Self Defense = When a country conservatives like invades
                            another country

"No Mandate" = When an incumbent Democratic president wins by a small
               margin
"Winning Handily" = When an incumbent Republican president wins by the
                    smallest margin in history

"Enforcing the will of the people" = When a Republican politician pushes an
                                     issue the public at large agrees with
"Exhibiting political courage" = When a Republican politician pushes an
                                 issue the public at large doesn't agree with

"Debt under a Democratic president" = Fiscally irresponsible
"Debt under a Republican president that's even larger" = Fiscally conservative

"Old News" = Any Republican scandal that's never been fully investigated and/or
             prosecuted
"Serious Unresolved Issue" = Any Democratic scandal that's never been fully 
                             investigated and/or prosecuted

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